Moo!

SOCIALISM: You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbor.


COMMUNISM: You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.


FASCISM: You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.


NAZISM: You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM: You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks
the other, then throws the milk away.

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell your herd and retire
on the profit.

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take
harmonica lessons.

AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one and force the other
to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse
why the cow has dropped dead.

FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike, organise a riot
and block the roads because you want three cows.

JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are
one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.

GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live
for 100 years, eat once a month and milk themselves.

SPANISH CORPORATION: You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.

RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have
five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them
again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another
bottle of vodka.

SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5,000 cows. None of them belong to you. You
charge the owners for storing them.

CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 30 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity and
arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship them.

BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. Both are mad.

IRAQI CORPORATION: Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them
that you have none. No-one believes you so they bomb the shit out of you and
invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least now you are a
Democracy.

WELSH CORPORATION : You have two cows. The one on the left looks very
attractive.